Salt Lake city is soon to curb Santa Clause's habit of flying dangerously low. Yup, so they'll have santa-free skies and lots of really upset kids once they figure out what City Hall did.
I suppose Santa doesn't get to visit the White House either, cause of the anti-aircraft artillery mounted on its roof. What with the 9/11 attack, I'm sure official are not going to take any risks from flying gift baskets. Who knows when Al-Qaeda will hijack Santa's ride and put a plastic knife against Rudolf's neck?
Santa : Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas!!
(Sleigh arc's towards the White House upon which two Secret Service agents are manning the AA guns.)
AA Gunner 1: Fuzz*, its coming right for us!
AA Gunner 2: Its Santa. George's daughters must have been good this year.
AA Gunner 1: Ya fuzzin' kidding me? These are the Twins we're talking about!
AA Gunner 2: Good God, you're right! Frag that sleigh!!
Santa : Ho ho ho, peace and joy to...
(And little Timmy, who lived a street behind the White House, never received his presents that Christmas Day)
*edited for the kiddies
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